Skip to main content

Returning to Work

woman at work computer
When you’ve lost a loved one it is hard to imagine going back to your old self and life. After all, your whole life has changed. One task many of us face shortly afterwards is going back to work. 

It can be for many different reasons: 

  • due to financial circumstances 
  • we feel we should or have to as part of leading a normal life
  • we feel isolated at home
  • the distraction might help us heal 

As you approach your return to work date, you might be thinking about the following:

  • is this the right time? Am I ready? 
  • is there an option to go back part time and see if you’re truly ready to fulfill your responsibilities?
  • what if you don't want to go back to your old job?

These questions are all justified! There is no written rule as to when you have to go back to work. Some of us are ready sooner than others.

In some cases, you might go back to work too soon and realize you are not ready yet. And that is okay. If possible, take some extra time off. Many employers are very supportive and will work with you by giving you light duties or more time off, paid or unpaid. Some offer and provide mental health support. Talk to your employer before going back to work and communicate your concerns and fears, if any. This way both of you are prepared with each other's expectations and feelings.

You might even decide to start your own business in order to have more control over when and where you work. That can be a big step, but it might be the best solution for some.

Remember, you’ve been through a heartbreaking loss, and it takes a toll on your physical and mental health. Some people experience memory loss, lack of patience, lack of focus, low or no energy. Oh, and don't forget the sudden breakdowns and crying spells are ALL normal and can last weeks, months and in some cases, years.

It is important to remember and respect your own limits to ensure you don't burn out. Self-care is essential even if it is the last thing on your mind. Do what works for you – it could be exercise, massage, rest. Taking care of yourself is the first step to taking care of anything else.